This afternoon Jeremy and I drove by the site of our accident (north of Riggs Road on the I-10 South). We went for a few reasons:
1. This trip is way overdue. It's been over a year since our accident but this was not a part of the healing process I was looking forward to.
2. Jeremy will be in Tucson for work all of next week and I'm going down to visit him. Meaning, I'll have to make the drive by myself.
3. The speed limit is 75. And since driving 55 with your hazards on could still potentially get you a ticket, wifey here needs to learn how to be comfortable driving 75.
Round 1 went like this:
Driver--Jeremy
Shotgun--Laura
Purse--Securely in lap
Ambiance--Air1
Speed--65ish (Thankfully we were behind a semi)
As we drove by I started to get a bigger grasp on truly what a huge miracle it was that he and I survived, let alone have practically nothing to show from it. There were giant metal stakes in the middle of the medians and a huge overpass only minutes away from our accident site. Had we hit either of those, I'm sure the outcome would have been significantly different.
So these Praise Jesus emotions come over me and we pull off the Riggs Road exit and have a few minutes of THANK YOU GOD! Then we turn around and start heading north.
Then my hubby takes the next exit, pulls into the gas station and says, "Now it's your turn. I need to know that you can drive this with me here."
He's such a sweet, thoughtful husband. But these were not the words I wanted to hear. I was ready for food. Not ready to face my biggest fear.
Round 2, here we go:
Driver--Laura
Shotgun--Jeremy
Purse--securely in back seat
Air conditioning--check
Music--still Air1
Wheel--tightly grasped by tiny hands and white knuckles
Ready, GO!
So this is where it gets so cool. By the end of it I was shaking my head saying, "He would do something like this!"
As we wait patiently in the turn lane to go back past ground zero, the light turns green and we follow yet another semi onto the freeway. Then He does it. On comes my song. And, yes, that's how I referred to it when I squealed with excitement and turned up the volume. My song. This is the song God used to talk to ME!
Song--Beautiful Ending by Barlow Girl (please refer to very top of blog page if you're confused with the incredible "coincidence" of this song being played)
For starters, I haven't heard this song on the radio since I started this blog. This song was the whole inspiration for starting this blog and such a big part of what I felt God was putting on my heart when I started this whole thing.
Please take a moment to actually listen to the words.
http://youtu.be/ghgpz0IWV0E
I cried tears of joy for the entire song as I attempted to sing along. For me, this was God saying,
I love you. I will always take care of you. Trust me. I delivered you before.
You can get through this because you have MY strength in you, not your own.
Together, we will make it through this.
And of course, the song ended as soon as we passed the site. GOD IS SO GOOD. He is just so cool I honestly can't get over it. All I kept thinking was, "God, You so would do this! You so would pick just the right song at just the right moment to speak to my heart and let me know that you are always with me and that you can get me through anything! PRAISE JESUS!
Bah! God is seriously just the best. I know that sounds ridiculous and that it's such an understatement, but I don't know how else to put it into words. How can you possibly put the awesomeness of God into words?? He is so merciful and He loves us SO MUCH!
I now know that I can make it. I can make that drive next week without my handsome there to hold my hand because I know that I will have my God riding shotgun.
Thank you Jesus for all that you have done for us, especially over this past year. Thank you for reminding me that it is not by my strength that I should measure my obstacles, but by Yours because I am Your daughter and, because of that, I have you strength in me!
(On a side note, the purse is mentioned because it was at my feet right before the accident and it is the whole reason why I tried to bend forward and ended up unbuckling my seatbelt.)
Such a Praise Jesus day! Just as every day should be!
LEE
